YOUR GROWTH IS VALID
Even when surrounded by incredibly talented and gifted people, you still have your own strengths and gifts, too.
Even when you feel like you must try harder to stand out, what makes you unique can shine just as brightly as your ambition.
Even when you desire feedback or validation from others, it is not too late for you to make connections that will offer support.
Even when you find yourself becoming all too aware of the way others do things, the depth of your insights is as valuable as your presence.
Remember these things when you find yourself wondering if you will ever be “enough” to truly make an impact in this world. Yes, there will be people you encounter with great talent who bring a gift to the world, but that doesn’t take away from what you have to share, even if it shows up in different ways. There will be those whom you long to hear say, “I’m proud of you,” you are allowed to feel what you need to feel while knowing that their lack of acknowledgment doesn’t take away from what you are worth. There will also be those whom you may pay close attention to and be inspired by, but the way you can eloquently tell the story of the work they do doesn’t take away from the fact that someone could do the same for you.
Yes, there is always room for growth, but your growth doesn’t only become valid when you reach the peak of someone else's expectations or standards. Even when someone else’s standards could lead to new opportunities or possibilities, this is still true: Your story, your growth, and your contribution cannot be quantified based on someone else’s perception of you.
Continue to get to know, hone your strengths, and nurture your gifts by identifying how you can be kind to yourself as you continue to grow:
If you feel the urge to make significant changes after observing others, pause and reflect on this question: “Is this a genuine desire, or am I reacting to external pressures?” “Am I seeking a fresh start, or am I influenced by comparisons?” Remember, it is never too much to remember why you do it and consider what’s most important for you.
When you seek approval or validation for your endeavors, spend a moment with this thought: “Beyond validation, what am I truly seeking? Is it a sense of belonging? A need for love or affection?” Understand that desiring these things doesn't signify weakness. Allow yourself to recognize these feelings and explore healthy ways to navigate them by seeking genuine connections with others. Pay attention to the places in your life where you do not feel like you have to perform.
If you find yourself observing others and then feeling overwhelmed with options about all the things you could do, leading you to retreat or disengage, treat yourself with compassion as you ponder this: “How can I create a space to be myself and recover, while also cultivating bravery in my interactions with others?” Seek out environments and communities where you feel like you can allow yourself to be curious without the pressure to join in on everything right away. Pace yourself and engage at a mindful pace.
Wherever you find yourself, remember that you are on a unique journey. And on this unique journey, you are allowed to ask yourself unique questions that relate to where you are.
You've likely encountered questions like "So, what do you do?" or "What's your major/role/passion?" However, while these questions might be customary, they hardly scratch the surface of the rich tapestry of human experiences. You have every right to delve deeper. Embrace the chance to ask more nuanced questions about our unique strengths and the diverse gifts we offer the world. Allow yourself to reflect on these queries and invite others to do the same. Because if you've ever felt overwhelmed by the myriad paths you could embark on, you're not alone, so asking more thoughtful questions can help take the pressure off of others, too.
What is bringing you joy right now that you would like to go deeper into?
Where do you find spontaneous joy, free from planning or future concerns?
When good thing have you not been able to stop thinking about?
What aspects of what you do each week resonate with your heart?
Is there something you really enjoy being a leader/in charge of? What is it?
Has there ever been a moment in your life where you were just happy to be a part of something, even if you didn’t know what your specific role was?
What things have you been able to do in your life that make you feel the most seen and loved for who you are?
What subjects have you been diving deep into lately that are important to you?
Why do you do what you do?
Has your “why” changed over the past ten years? Why do you think that is?
When and where have you felt the most free to be yourself? What were you doing? Who were you with? What did it feel like?
These questions are only the beginning, but they can serve as alternatives to more general questions that cause us to get stuck. May these questions invite you to go deeper into the things that make you you. May you continue to explore how you can be more authentically you right here where you are.
More in this week's series called "Embrace Your Journey Authentically", only with a subscription in the Storyteller App.
More tomorrow…
Sincerely,
Morgan Harper Nichols
@thestorytellerco
@morganharpernichols
